Worst...Customers...........EVER!

[East_TX_Spa]

So, I get a heads up that the old hippie couple may be heading my way.  When I asked "What they look like?", I was told "Like you'd expect old hippies to look like...you'll know them.  They never smile and they're just plain mean."

I damned near did a cartwheel, I was so excited!

Sure enough, they showed up about an hour later and walked into my store.  I welcomed them, told them to make themselves at home and I'd be with 'em momentarily.  He looked to be in his late 60's and paunchulent with longish gray hair and a yenkel (combover).  She was pear-shaped and school-marmish with granny glasses and a Band-aid on the side of her nose (to hide her witch's wart).

Moments after they entered the store, another older couple who bought a Tiger River Bengal from me and Roger Falcone 2 years ago came in to get chems.

For reference:
OHL (Old hippie lady)
OHD (Old hippie dude)
VNLC (Very nice lady customer)
VNMC (Very nice man customer)

Then, the charade began:

OHL: "Are these HotSpring Spas?"
Term: "Yes ma'am.  We've been selling them for 22 years."
OHL: "Is this the Jetsetter?"
Term: "Yes ma'am."

VNLC interjects: "These spas are wonderful!  We've had ours for two years and we love it."

OHL: "How much do they cost?"

I told her.  She kept playing ignorant as did I.  She had a little notebook and was writing in it.  OHD just scowled and don't say nothin'.

Now, I had been advised that they were probably going to try and see if we (they did not know my store is owned by the same man as the Tyler store) would take spas back if the customer was not satisfied.  We have in the past if there were extenuating circumstances (death, imprisonment, etc), but not under the conditions in which they were trying to operate.

After some more inane banter, OHL asks "Do you ever have people return their spas because they're too hot?" (This was another of her complaints, the hot tub is too hot.  Lady, it is Texas, it is a hunnert degrees everyday and your spa sits in the sun.)

VNLC (she is GREAT!):  "Oh, our spa is so hot during this part of the year we don't ever even use it.  I can't imagine why ANYONE would want to return a HotSpring Spa.  We've owned other spas that were just junk, but this is the best money we've ever spent."

OHL just grunts.

To be continued....

Term

[96SC]

I hope you give the VNLC and VNCM (I think that's the designation) their next year of chems free.  

[In Canada eh]

Substitute redneck, black, Canadian or gay for hippie and how does it change the thread.

Hey

   Now we are being lumped in with rednecks

   What if Terms customer was a flamboyant, black, Canadian in overalls, does that make it OK

[East_TX_Spa]

OHL: "We've owned 2 HotSpring Spas when we lived in Florida.  We bought one in about 1979 and another in the early 90's.  They never overheated."

Term: "Ma'am, the best way I can describe it to you is this:  take a big ol' tub of ice and sit it outside next to your hot tub.  Come back 2 days later...are you going to find a tub of ice, or a tub of a hunnert and five degree water?"

Her facade begins to wane, but neither of us lets on.

OHL: "We turn the heater off and it's still hot...um...would it be if we turned the heater off?"

Term:  "I've had customers turn their spa down to twenty degrees below zero and their spa is still a hunnert and five.  It's a HOT TUB.. they're made to stay HOT.  We sell them in Norway, Alaska, Greenland, Mesopotamia...some of the coldest places on earth.  They are made to stay hot and to do so more efficiently than any other spa.  The only drawback to that is during August and early September in East Texas, they are too hot to use unless you take some steps to counteract the heat."

Hold on, I have to get another beer.  I';ll be back tin a  little bit...

Temrinator

[East_TX_Spa]

Sorry, dangblanged phone kept ringing and a man ordered a Jetssetter, so I'm bakc now>

OHD chimes in: "So, how hot will these spas get?"

Term: "Hot enough to bake your biscuits."

OHD smiles.  He has fairly nice teefths, although I don't know if they is real.

VNLC: "We take milk jugs and fill them with water and stick them in the freezer.  Then we throw them in the spa and it helps cool them down a little bit."

OHL: "But if we left the cover on, would it still get really hot?"

Term: "Oh my gawsh, the cover makes the problem even whores!  Prop the lid open a bit and get some airflow throwgh there and it will help."

OHL: "Oh, these pillows are new." (Talking about the redeisign that occrueed about a months ago)

Hold on, I have to pee.

Term: "Yes ma'am, they redeisiengd them about a month ago.  The new pillows are great."

OHL: "Can you put the new ones on older spas?" (Once again, tipping her hand)

Term: "You can but you'd have to drill a hole in the spa."

Anyways, blah, blha blah, she just kept asking inane questions one after anotyher.

I excused myself to help the nice couple who just kept on imploring that the old hippies buy a spa.  I got their chemiscals, walked them out to their car, and they left.

I had every intention of giving them the chems free , but couldn't do it in front of the hippies.  But I'll take great care of them next time and explain the situation to them.

Gotta go, back to wrap it up.

Temrin

[East_TX_Spa]

OHL: "Who owns this store?"

Term: "Mr. RPG owns all of the HotSpring stores around here.  I have never worked for a finer individual: honest as the day is long, fair, reasonable.  I will never work for anyone else.  He sells a quality product, takes care of the customers, and I have never had anyone say a bad word about him.  Our custoemers absoluttley love him."

OHL: <grunts several times while I'm saying this>

OHL turns to her husband and says "What do you think?  Do you want to get one?"

I'm layin' low and chucklin' in my stomach.....

OHD: "I need to think about it.  We'll be back."

Oh, I'm sure you will.

I left out a lot of stuff due to time constraints, but I think the old man really liked me.  I got him to chucklin' a few times and he seemed alright.  The old hippie lady?  Totally self absorbed, malevolent prude.

I think the old man was ready to buy a spa from me.

I'm sorry, I started writing this about 2 hours ago and I got busy and am just now finishing up.  I'll remember where I was in a little while.

Teri

[Jacuzzi Jim]

 Was this them??  

[anne]

I am new to this forum so you all have the right to tell me to shut my trap, but I believe the hippy refrences help paint a mental picture of this story.  Nothing more, nothing less.  Its clear intent was not to trash all hippies.

oh, like that makes it ok.  

Term, how in the world does this make sense? "...Like you'd expect old hippies to look like...you'll know them.  They never smile and they're just plain mean."

I get that you are going for comedy, but at least make generalizations that make sense, not just generalizations that make you sound like a close minded Texan.

Sorry, guys, I'm in a SERIOUSLY bad mood today, and now soured on what I thought was going to be a great story.

[Cyn]

Anne--there have been a whole lot of bad remarks, petty references and just plain rambling, off the cuff, nasty things said on this forum and yet you choose to pick on this one??  

[Mendocino101]

Was this them??  

Are they wearing matching dresses...?

[96SC]

Sounds like the OHD turned into not such a bad 'dude' after all. You should invite him to one of your 'gator huntin', pig pickin', mud riddin' git togethers.'  
FAR OUT MAN

[anne]

Anne--there have been a whole lot of bad remarks, petty references and just plain rambling, off the cuff, nasty things said on this forum and yet you choose to pick on this one??  

Actually, there usually isn't much nasty here, and at least most of the rambling makes sense. There is very little racism and classism here, so why should there be social exclusion? And what is it to you what offends me?

[tony]

They couldn't be real hippies.  Real hippies wouldn't buy a plastic HotSpring spa.  They would be at Doc's buying a traditional wood hot tub.

[iggythewetcat]

Maybe they need DAIT!

[Cyn]

Anne,
I could say the same to you...what's it to you what Term classifies as a hippie??  Isn't your problem.  Is your being judgemental of Term and his remarks going to make him less judgemental?  You even appologized as you wrote your remark for your bad mood... :-?