It seems like this time of the year all of the weirdness starts. Here are a few examples from the last week:
1. A same-gendered couple came in two weeks ago and looked at spas. They came back this last Friday and bought a HotSpring Envoy. They told me they had looked at Bullfrog and when I asked them why they went with us, they told me their reasons. And then, the pitcher told me that the Bullfrog saleslady told them that "Bullfrog Spas are the only spas you can change the filters without opening the cabinet."
I said "What the hell?" We all gaily agreed that if you're going to exagerrate a feature, you should try to pick one a little less easily disproved.
Anyways, they are getting their spa delivered in about 30 minutes.
2. A shrivelled old miserly woman came in a couple of weeks ago. I accidentally squirted her in her cooch with water from a spa that was a few gallons low. I profusely apologized and sincerely felt awful. Anyways, she keeps calling me wanting to know when the spas are going on sale. I told her we're starting our clearance sale on Saturday. She says her husband says "we can get one cheaper after New Year's" and I told her "no, you can't. This is the cheapest they'll ever be and I'll guarantee it."
So, she comes back in on Thursday and acts like she's never been here. I again apologized for squirting her in the fupa and she still pretended she'd never been here before. "I'll tell you this, you're competing against Bullfrog."
"OK, they are a good choice, but let me ask you this....what do you like about their spas?"
She starts squealing "I know you're going to start talking them down and I don't want to hear it!!"
Me: "No ma'am, I'm just trying to find out what you like or dislike so that I won't waste your time showing you something you don't like."
"Well, the lady down there told me she doesn't float in their loungers."
Me: "Did you try out the spa? You are welcome to wet test any of our spas to see if you float or not. But please, don't take mine or anyone else's word...try it for yourself."
"There you go talking bad about them, I don't want to hear it!"
Me: "Here's a brochure. Thanks for stopping by."
3. A little bitty fella with one arm just left. He wants a small spa and I showed him a Solana TX. It runs off of a 110V outlet.
LBF: "JHC! That'll run my electric bill through the roof!"
Me: "No it won't. It'll cost you less than $10/month."
LBF: "Everybody's telling me that 110V components will cost more than 220V."
Me: "Who on earth is telling you that?"
LBF: "Thermospas. I talked to them on the phone and they told me that 220V components are cheaper to replace than 110V."
I took the time to explain all about Thermospas and their deceptive ways. Turns out, he's looking to spend around a thousand dollars for a spa, so I wished him well.
Folks are just getting weirder by the day.
Terminator
