Term,
Now about your 2'5" customers :-?
It is truly a tale of woe. I have only told it once before, but as I am never one to withhold information from the fine folks on this forum, I will share this story with you. I only hope that it will not be too much for you to bear.
Once upon a beautiful fall morning, much as this very one and not too long ago, I was busily resting on my laurels in the back office when the titillating door chime sounded in the showroom announcing a visitor. Naturally, I began salivating like Pavlov's dog at the mere thought of lining my pocket with ill-gotten booty.
As is my custom, I briefly hesitated before entering the showroom in order not to frighten my quarry into an expedient retreat from my lair. After approximately 30 seconds, I wiped the froth from my lips, put on my pants, and strode confidently and expectantly into the arena.
No one was there. Very, very strange.
As I turned dejectedly to resume my inactivity, a gruff voice emanated from the front of my establishment.
"Is innybody here?!" the voice rumbled.
"Um, yes sir...where are you?" I queried.
"Down here, young feller, lookin' at this wangdoozler jacoozi."
As I walked trepidly past the large Vanguard in the middle of the store, I hesitantly gazed around it's beatifully arched corner to behold a sight that chilled me to the boner.
Down on the floor, fervently running his hand over the taupe exterior of a Solana TX, was a 60 year old gentleman. The unfortunate soul was equipped with no appendages below his waist. In fact, the only visible appendages were his head and one long, muscular arm which was gripping the edge of the shell with an eager clinch as if he were holding onto a precarious precipice over some unfathomable depth.
"Well, don't stand there like a ninny...gimme a boost so's I can see inside!" he chided.
"Yes sir!" I says whilst lifting up his surprisingly hefty girth.
"Say now, that there is a fine and dandy lookin' tub. It'd be perfect fer my bedroom. Lemme down now, son" he instructed. "How much dis cost?"
"$3795 with cover, delivery, set up, and chemicals," I proudly exclaimed.
Then, I beheld a sight that can only be described as a joyful pirouette of the infirmed and insane. He began loudly whooping and traversing in a circular pivot on his good arm while flapping his withered "flipper" which slightly protruded from his right shoulder. He managed about 4 360 degree spins before slowing down and shouting "Hot damn, write me up!"
"Yes sir! We can deliver it tomorrow if you'd like?"
He liked, we did, and I've never seen him again.
True story, every bit, except for me drooling.
Terminator
